I’ve been doing the Daily Stoic journal for over a year now. But if I’m honest? It was surface level. Read the passage, write a quick answer, move on. Check the box. It felt like a chore more than actual growth.
Then something shifted this week.
I’m deep into 75 Hard Phase 1 right now, building physical discipline through two daily workouts, nutrition, water, reading. But I realized I needed to level up the mental game too. Not just read about Stoic philosophy – actually practice it. Actually internalize it.
As a dad to a 5-year-old, I needed more than abstract philosophy. I needed practical stoic parenting strategies that work in real life – when patience runs thin, when words slip out that I regret, when I’m running on empty by day’s end.
So I started discussing each day’s passage with Claude instead of just writing quick answers in my journal. And honestly? The difference has been massive.
Here’s what seven days of daily stoic practice taught me about being a better parent, partner, and human.
Day 1: Let Your Virtues Shine
The Lesson: Your virtues should shine consistently, regardless of circumstances or timing. Like a lamp that keeps burning as long as it has fuel.
The Question: How will I let my virtues shine today?
What Hit Me: I wrote about being kind-hearted, patient, not jumping to conclusions. Understanding that the person on the other side may be going through things too.
But here’s what I didn’t write – by the end of most days, I’m running on empty. My 5-year-old son gets the worst version of me. Work drains me, the day accumulates, and by pickup time I’ve got nothing left in the tank. He’s been holding it together at school all day, and when I pick him up, he’s done. We’re meeting each other at completely different energy levels.
This is where stoic parenting really gets tested – not in calm moments, but when you’re depleted.
The realization: I need small breaks during the day. Not just for me – for him. So I actually have fuel in that lamp when it matters most. This connects to what I learned about pre-performance rituals – you can’t control your son’s energy levels, but you can control how you prepare yourself to meet him where he’s at.
Day 2: The Most Valuable Asset
The Lesson: Seneca says the wise person invests in themselves – in being good and wise. That’s the only asset that can’t be taken away, even facing execution.
The Question: If wisdom is the most valuable asset, how have I invested in it?
What Hit Me: I’m constantly trying to improve – reading books, listening to valuable podcasts, watching content that increases my skillset. Now I’m using AI to go deeper, to actually internalize what I’m reading instead of just consuming it.
This connects directly to 75 Hard. The physical discipline is one investment. But daily stoic practice? That’s investing in the asset that will carry me through everything else. When Seneca faced Nero’s executioners, it wasn’t his money or friends that sustained him. It was his character, his virtue, his inner strength.
That’s what I’m building here. That’s what every parent needs when facing the daily challenges of raising kids.
Day 3: We Are All Part of the Same Whole
The Lesson: Marcus Aurelius reminds us that everything is interconnected. We’re all “little rivers running into one lake.” Cruelty only happens when we forget this connection.
The Question: Do I live as if we are all one – all part of the same whole?
What Hit Me: It’s easy to forget. We all live in our own little worlds. And in your world, you’re not wrong. So the driver who cuts you off may not feel he was wrong, but in your eyes he was.
This was a huge realization for me – and a cornerstone of practical stoic parenting. Everyone is the main character in their own story. Their choices make sense to them based on their perspective, their struggles, their moral compass. I can’t control that. What I can control is whether I carry anger about it or just let it be.
My son too – he’s living in his 5-year-old world where things make perfect sense to him, even when they’re driving me crazy. He’s not trying to test my patience. He’s just navigating his own experience.
Day 4: All For One, One For All
The Lesson: “That which isn’t good for the hive, isn’t good for the bee.” Actions that genuinely serve the whole are what’s truly good for you as an individual.
The Question: Will my actions today be good for all concerned?
What Hit Me: I’ve always operated on “take care of my immediate family first, everyone else will figure it out.” But this challenged that thinking.
When I practice patience with my son, work on my wisdom, model kindness – that’s good for him, good for me, good for our relationship, and honestly good for everyone who interacts with both of us. The patience I’m building with him makes me a better person in every interaction.
When I choose not to carry negative energy from bad interactions, I’m not bringing that toxicity into the next situation. That serves everyone.
It’s not about sacrificing my family’s wellbeing. It’s about recognizing that my choices either serve the whole (which includes me) or harm it (which also includes me).
Day 5: Words Can’t Be Unsaid
The Lesson: Zeno said “Better to trip with the feet than with the tongue.” You can get up after you fall, but words can never be unsaid.
The Question: What do I say that’s better left unsaid?
What Hit Me: Two things immediately came to mind – cursing at my son when I lose my temper, and getting angry in traffic.
This one hurt because I know it’s true. When I snap at him or let a bad word slip, he might move on quickly like kids do. But I carry that guilt all evening. Those words are out there. I can’t take them back.
The solution isn’t complicated: take a deep breath, let things be, practice patience. Remember that what I say can’t be unsaid. That pause – that fraction of a second between what happens and how I respond – that’s where wisdom lives. This connects directly to what I’ve learned about managing your inner dialogue – the conversation you have with yourself in that moment determines everything.
Day 6: Looking Out For Each Other
The Lesson: Seneca challenges us to celebrate others’ successes, even when it’s hard. Our “hunter-gatherer minds” make us think life is zero-sum, but genuine celebration of others strengthens our own virtue.
The Question: Who else can I root for – other than myself?
What Hit Me: I caught myself doing this on social media. Someone posts good news and my immediate reaction was “yes that’s amazing but…” Then I’d compare myself to their accomplishment instead of just celebrating them.
That “but” completely changes the energy from celebration to comparison. And the comparison doesn’t just steal my ability to be happy for them – it makes me feel worse about my own life.
The shift: remember we’re all in different places. Their success doesn’t diminish mine. When I genuinely root for others without the comparison, I’m not weighed down by jealousy and resentment. That alone improves my quality of life.
Plus, like attracts like. Not in some mystical way, but practically – when you genuinely celebrate others, you build stronger relationships, see more possibilities, create environments where good things happen.
Day 7: A Selfish Reason To Be Good
The Lesson: Marcus Aurelius says “The person who does wrong, does wrong to themselves.” If you need a selfish reason not to do wrong – you’re the one who has to live with the consequences.
The Question: Why does my wrongdoing hurt me most of all?
What Hit Me: Because I’m ultimately hurting myself. It brings me right back to that negative energy I’ve been working all week to get away from.
The harsh words to my son – he moves on, I carry the guilt. The anger at drivers – they’re long gone, I’m stewing in it. The jealousy when someone succeeds – they’re celebrating, I’m feeling bitter.
Every bit of wrongdoing creates negative energy inside me. It’s like poisoning my own well.
This ties everything together. When I practice patience, invest in wisdom, remember interconnectedness, consider the whole, choose my words carefully, and genuinely celebrate others – I’m not just being “good” in some abstract sense. I’m protecting my own peace. I’m keeping that negative energy out.
What Actually Changed This Week
Here’s what made this week different from all the surface-level journaling I’ve done before – and why this approach to daily stoic practice actually works:
I had a real moment with my son. He was acting up. I felt myself getting heated. But instead of staying there and saying something I’d regret, I just walked away. I took a walk. Came back calmer. That’s stoic parenting in action – not perfection, but progress.
I shifted how I see other people. When someone does something I don’t agree with, my default used to be anger or judgment. Now I catch myself: they’re the main character in their story. Their moral compass sent them that way. It just is. I can’t control that. What I can control is whether I carry anger about it.
I’m actually internalizing this stuff. Going back and forth in discussion, connecting these ancient principles to my actual life – my son, traffic, social media, my daily struggles – that’s when it clicks. I remember more from this week than I have from months of quick journal entries.
The 75 Hard Connection
75 Hard is teaching me physical discipline. Two workouts daily, specific nutrition, a gallon of water, 10 pages of reading. It’s building mental toughness through consistent action.
Daily stoic practice is teaching me mental discipline. How I respond to challenges, how I carry myself through the day, what I do with difficult emotions. It’s building wisdom through consistent reflection.
They reinforce each other. The physical challenge gives me situations to practice Stoic principles. The Stoic principles give me frameworks to handle the physical challenge better.
Both are about doing hard things intentionally. Both are about becoming a better version of yourself through daily practice. And both are essential for stoic parenting – you can’t pour from an empty cup.
What I’m Taking Forward
If you’re a busy dad or professional thinking “I don’t have time for daily stoic practice” – I get it. I’m doing two workouts a day, raising a 5-year-old, working full time. Time is tight.
But this isn’t about adding more to your plate. It’s about getting more out of what you’re already doing. These 10-15 minutes of reflection each morning (or evening when mornings don’t work) have changed how I move through my entire day.
The beauty of stoic parenting is that it’s not a rulebook – it’s a framework. You’re not trying to be perfect. You’re trying to be present, intentional, and wise in how you respond to your kids and to life.
I’m continuing this practice. Not because it’s easy or because I’m getting it all right. I’m continuing it because I’m getting way more out of it than I ever did from surface-level journaling.
The ancient Stoics weren’t philosophers sitting in towers theorizing about life. They were leaders, parents, people dealing with real struggles. Marcus Aurelius wrote his Meditations while leading an empire and fighting wars. Seneca dealt with one of history’s most tyrannical leaders.
Their wisdom isn’t abstract theory. It’s practical philosophy for real life.
And it works.
What about you? What’s one stoic practice you could start today? How might stoic parenting principles help you show up better for your kids?
Want to follow my 75 Hard journey and daily stoic reflections? I’m sharing it all on yveslanot.com. Real challenges, real lessons, real growth.